Chelsea Handler’s a funny bitch

I read Chelsea’s book by accident over the summer and she is a damn funny lady. I also watched her pick TI apart the other day…by accident. Her book is kind of like a ladies version of tucker max and her show is like a cheaper conan obrien, where her jokes are so bad they are funny and then she gets some real zingers. I like when she asks him about the machine guns.

Here’s the video. Thank you Fabian from Fresno for the tip.

“Do you sell prostitutes? (haha no) oh, I was going to say we probably know each other.” ohh Chelsea.

This is what they do in the south?

if it doesnt work click here.

I guess this is the first step for kids to get into those stomp squads and shit in fraternities in the south. Notice the words of the song as you watch, “Obama on the left McCain on the right”, then you see the token white kid boppin up and down like he’s at a sock hop on the right…subliminal?

This video come from Skeeter B. out of Youkon, Oh. Thanks for the submission Skeet, keep em comin. Anyone else interested in getting their findings on the site let me know.

Ubun-2

courtesy of the stool

The Pats are fighting for first place in the AFC East and doing a good job. The Sox played their hearts out and had some injuries down the stretch. Let us not forget the truest dynasty of them all and maybe of all sports, the boston fucking celtics. We’re going to repeat and the NBA will continue its comeback riding the coattails of a boston team.

Where you at Weezy?

Apparently Wayne thinks he’s better than Jay Z and Lebron James combined. Last night, this guy treated his fans worse than Eminem treated Stan. He stood them up at Jamn 94.5’s Monster Jam because he sipped too much sizzurp and felt he was above the law (surprise).

According to Ramiro at Jamn this motherfucker got so fucked up in his trailer that he refused to go through the metal detector. There were alot of big names at this concert (Jigga and Bron-bron amongst others) and they all went through it no problem. Now I’m not saying he was strapped (yes i am) but the fact that his DJ was already on the stage calling his name to come out he shoulda given someone his gun and got the fuck out there. People paid good money to see him, even though there were other people at the concert most of the crowd was there for him. Thats bullshit weezy f and you’re a baby. I was supposed to be going to tonight’s concert but some shit fell through and i’m kinda glad i never got the tickets because if he pulled that shit when i was there i woulda…well, done nothing except be really pissed.

I’ve heard weezy in some recent interviews and whatnot and his new songs even, he just doesn’t sound right. No I’m not talking about the synthesizer that he loves to use in his songs I’m talking about the fact that this man has lost his damn mind more than before. All those years of sizzurp and cheeba must be catching up to him because he’s just not there most of the time. I’m guessing its under 3 years before he overdoses or dies of problems from all the drugs he’s already done. Let me be clear, I don’t want that to happen, despite his misdoings last night I still love the man and respect everything he’s done creatively, but he’s bout ta die and its not going to be pretty.

“Next time you mention pac, biggy, or Jay Z, don’t forget about Weezy babe-eee” minus Jay Z and the reason they will be mentioning him is because they’re all gonna die too early.

Fuck Weezy for the moment. Rape Wayne while you’re at it.

I do however like his blogs on ESPN.com. For a fuckin idiot who sounds like a dragon with a mouth full of people when he talks he can actually write in a coherent way. He has some good shit to say about current sporting events and he knows his stuff. The fact that he’s a Red Sox fan helps too but I mean I think its part of being a Blood (the red B on the cap is why they all wear sox hats). He also likes the Bruins for some reason, and even I hate those bastards.

nicknames

peebody can't travel through time like Mr. Peabody could

In the last week a bunch of my friends have gotten new nicknames from things they have done. My favorite was my roommate who had to pee on the shuttle and decided to ask a kid on the basketball team if he could use his seat.

roommie: “i gotta pee really bad dude. let me sit in this seat so i can just go on the floor”

bball player 1: “fuck no get the hell out of here”

roommie: “i’m gonna piss my pants if i don’t go right now let me just go on the ground”

bball player 2: “then pee ya damn pants son”

bball player 1: “yeah i dont give a shit whatchu gotta do pee body now get the hell away from us”

so he walks away and sits upfront of the shuttle. as the ride went on his face got tight and you could tell he had to go baaad. the whole basketball team decided at this point to scream Peebody at him for the rest of the ride and watch him writhe in pain.

So thats this weeks new nickname. Anybody else got good stories?

pollock was a drunk

a new way to pass time in class. one step up from ms paint.i call this piece "alien bukake"

my roommate grant told me about this website, www.jacksonpollock.org, where you can make a pollock-like picture just by dragging your mouse and clicking to change the color. i had this art class one time where we watched the movie pollock and then painted like him the rest of class and it was on a thursday night so i pregamed in class and got the real effect. that painting is now hanging in my dads house, he must be so proud.